I identified with Calvin in the past. This year? Not so much.
Come to think of it – not only do I usually ignore the idea of making resolutions, I kinda smirk when people make them.
At least, when people make resolutions that make me roll my eyes and think, Really? I mean, good for you. But really?
You know. The giver-uppers of chocolate. The ones who say they’re going to yell less at their kids. The ones who say they are going to drink less wine.
People. You are setting yourself up for certain failure with these types of goals. We have young children. We need wine and chocolate to deal with all the whine and the subsequent yelling about the constant whine.
And in all seriousness – unless you are gaining a pound a week from eating chocolate, you seriously have a drinking problem, or your kids are honestly scared of you because you yell so much?
These aren’t resolutions that to me, are worth making.
And anyway, when I have gotten all earnest tried to make resolutions, I just end up breaking them. Then I feel guilty. And as a Queen of Guilt (like many of you, right?) I just don’t want MORE guilt.
However, this year is strangely different. I am not being snarky about resolutions. I not only have real resolutions, I have a Big One. And in spite of myself, I’ve already begun to tackle it.
My resolution may seem a little touchy-feely. A little vague. But for me – it’s very concrete. VERY real. And I know exactly what I need to do to get there.
My resolution: I will be healthy and happy in 2012.
Yeah, yeah, I know. That’s what everyone wants. Blah, blah, blah.
But you guys, I’m serious. And motivated. And it’s going to happen. Or I will be in a seriously bad spot a year from now.
Why? Some of the reasons, I will write about. Some, not so much.
But. I will achieve my goal. Failure is not an option.
There are two parts to my goal.
The first: Lose 10-15 pounds by Memorial Day weekend.
Not very original, I know. Pretty common goal. But for me? Considering my love of food and loathing of gyms, my dearth of free time and my fondness for snacks … well, it may not be original. But it’s necessary.
It all began with my baked-goods body parts post during the summer. That’s when I started thinking about getting fit again.
I am disgusted with my bagel belly. I am annoyed that my clothes have mysteriously started shrinking. I am sick of being tired and run-down.
I am not heavy. But I’m not fit. And I am intensely fearful of becoming overweight.
So last week, I started with small-group personal training at Fitness Together. It is really hard. REALLY hard. But I know I’ll stick with it because I have people depending on me to be there.
And that taps into my guilt complex in a good way. I hate letting people down. Plus, the sessions are built into my schedule. They’re appointments I need to keep. So I’ll be there.
The other part to my goal? Well, the first part focuses on my physical well-being. The second focuses on my mental well-being.
Like you, I don’t get enough me-time.
But perhaps unlike you, this fact doesn’t just annoy me or make me pine wistfully for less busy days.
Not having enough me-time makes me sad. Down. Puts me in a not-fun place.
It’s not something I’m comfortable discussing in depth on this blog. But let’s just say it has become abundantly clear that I need me-time to function well and to be happy.
So, this semester I am dropping a playgroup that I like. It’s a tough decision, but it’s a necessary one. I’m getting a sitter during that time and doing stuff for me. I’ll write. Read. That’s pretty much it.
It’s not a time to get things done – that’s what will be hard for me. Because my guilt will creep in and I’ll think, I’m paying someone to be watch Miss S. I should really clean out the office right now. Or organize Miss L’s birthday party. Or answer those emails.
But I need to remember those are tasks I want to accomplish. NOT things I want to do. Those are things that can get done on Thursday during those few free hours that both girls are at school. Thursdays are task days.
Friday mornings are mine. ALL MINE. I need it. I deserve it. And I’m claiming it.
Part of this thing I call momagement is managing my kids’ lives. And part of it is managing myself. So in 2012, I’m resolving to manage ME better.
It may be a boringly earnest, very common goal. But it’s my goal. And dammit, I’m going to achieve it.
This resolve makes me really want to ring in 2012 in an appropriate, goal-meeting way. So you know what I’m gonna be doing at midnight?
Sleeping. Because that’s what’ll start my year off on the right foot.
Are you a resolution maker? Or a resolution rebuffer? What are your 2012 goals? Or do you purposely have none?
